Saturday, April 4, 2009
august 24,2005-8:30am - reporting time in the auditorium for the orientation. i look around for some known faces and feel disappointed.the quantum jump from school to college scared the shit out of me.the only thought that was constantly running in my mind was when will the great year"2009" come? semesters rolled by.never a day has passed when i hadnt wanted to sit in the final year classroom and be done with this whole mess... now that am finally in fourth year and when i look back, the memories try to flood me and instigate a mixed feeling in me. the few happy memories(being very less in number) come to my mind first.these tend to dislodge the unhappy and unpleasant ones from the rugged stretch of land. recently on the last day of college, i just walked out of my class at the end of the day.. the short walk from my class encompassed the passage through my second year classroom and my eyes sat on the third year room as well..call it self pity or deja vu or nostalgia, i am very confused on this! the endless times when i have hated the class and the teachers,the endless punishments and fines... i must be really getting old for instead of some deep resentment which i should rightfully be feeling, i have somehow developed a sense of peace and forgiveness!lol i know this sounds very philosophical but thats the truth. i have accepted few things in life and realised that fighting against them would be like tryin to hold tight to the sand in the palm. the minute you realise it isnt possible and relax, it automatically stays in your hand! i guess this is what they call as with age comes wisdom. i sure seem to have found mine! sure, this is not how i wanted it to be but this is what i got. so why not try to accept the fact rather than fight against the odds when the whole ordeal is actually over?mind you, i am not a hypocrite to say that i miss college but i am not a masochist either! whats the point?